Wise Hand Poker

Whew.

I've only gotten punched a few times in my life. Turns out, one of the benefits of mastering double-speak and possessing an IQ higher than that of posterboard is that you can frequently talk your way out of situations that would normally find you receiving bodily harm.

The thing about getting punched is that no matter how recently the last time it happened to you, and regardless how vivid your recollection is of that time, you're still never ready for the entirety of the situation when it happens again.

This is what I realize at the end of every WSOP.

Now, probably more than 95% of the media, I love going down to the Rio everyday and walking the floor and giving a fist-pound to some famous pro I know (half because I whole-heartedly wish them well and half because I want people around to know that I know them... a little bit more of the latter with Shannon Elizabeth). I love getting there before everyone else and parking in the secret empty parking lot and taking the secret door in (you know, the one that I found out about ten days ago). I love helping create something that I think is legitimately the best of its kind in poker.

But seriously, 45 days is a long, fucking, time. And it takes getting up on day 45 (well like 41 in this case since we have to leave early to go cover Bellagio Cup), to really remind you what a punch actually feels like.

I feel like got a lot done this summer. I really think I helped take the show, along with Ali Nejad, to a new level. We didn't really start doing anything new or groundbreaking; we just got really good at the things that make the show good. Of course, without Ali, Joe, Gavin, Court, and all the guests, what I do is just a bunch of bulletpoints highlighted in different colors and geniusly organized into sections and subsections in a Microsoft Word document - but still, the show was great week after week and I like to think that enough of it was done with my help that I can take some substantial pride in that. I also had an Asian kid ask for my autograph and picture with me - that's happened before but this time the person didn't think I was Mike Matusow.

On a larger scale, I covered my third straight WSOP for my third different media outlet. I'm not sure what that says about me or the poker industry or both. I think at the very least it says that hopefully I've built up a skill set that will never leave me jobless in this volatile industry. I also moved into a smaller apartment (again, one of those push-pull accomplishments - proud of myself for getting through a move at one of the busiest times of my life? Or sickened that I had to move into a smaller apartment since I'm poor?), and played in my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th career WSOP tournaments (with a combined success level still far less than my first). I went to a strip club for the first time other than on my sister's 21st birthday (not recommended, btw), and I lost over 50 lbs and continue to follow my doctor's orders and not drink any alcohol at all (after a December freak seizure at Bellagio).

After you get punched, there's about 3 seconds where your brain and your body decide to totally forget where and when they are. It's probably the most devoid of conscious thought your brain will ever be. Then you realize where you are, and that you just got punched, and then you just kinda go from there. Nothing hurts yet because of Adrenaline.

So how was my WSOP overall? Well, I have no money, my new apartment is full of boxes and piles of clothes, and I just busted the last $40 in my Full Tilt account (after cashing out about $600, don't worry mom). On the other side, all my shorts from last summer are too big for me, I'm down to two Ativan a day, and there's a chance I might actually be able to pay my rent on time this month.

Not that any of that matters though, I won't be able to feel anything for another week or so.

This third blog is the final in my vacation experience. It was a wonderful time and I hope at least one of my five readers has enjoyed it. It may be my last blog for awhile because tournament Poker has been so very cruel to me and I am utterly disappointed how I can be beat so many times. It really is beginning to wear on me and I have hung in there but there comes a time when one can only take so much abuse.

Monday morning we met Jim Pittman and Jon Mcneely for breakfast about 10:00am. Jim was playing the Main Event at noon so after breakfast the girls and my wife went to the pool at the Rio.

Jon and I sat down at a three card poker game and Jon took a small hit so we got up to leave. We came across this game called the WSOP where you get two cards and bet every street if you want trying to beat the dealer.

It is a fun game and at a $15.00 minimum bet it can get expensive. Jon took about 400.00 and gave me 100.00 and we pooled our winnings together.After awhile of playing I got on a hot streak and before you knew it we had amassed a $1400.00 profit.

By now it was 3pm and the girls had enough of the pool and we went over to see how Jim was doing. On a flop of 6h-9h-3d a player to Jims left went all in for about 9,000 and the other player went all in for 18,000. Jim was stunned and showed me his hand ,66. HE FOLDED A SET OF SIXES. As the other two players turned their cards over the first guy had 6-9 for two pair and the other guy had 99 for a set. Jim made an incredible lay down when most others would have gone broke with that hand.

Jon came over and we went to the Tournament Registration booth and entered the $340.00 nightly NL tournament the WSOP has been offering since day one. Jon paid both our ways in with the winnings we had from the WSOP game and the tournament was going to start at 7:00pm

There were 116 entries and first place was $9,000.00 and the top 18 were going to get paid, bottom pay was $560.00.

I played very well...AGAIN... made some nice lay downs and only once did I make a big bet on the button with 5-4 hearts to steal the blinds and antes when they were at 300-600.

I had built my stack up to 30,000 after starting with 5,000 when I had KK and a short stack who was on tilt went all in for his last 4,000. The player from France to my left re-raised all in for 8,000 so I called. First player had 8-4 off and the French guy had AK. The board flopped the case King and I made a full house on the turn.

There were only 30 players left at this point and the average stack was around 21,000.

Now Jon went on a mad rush.. Called QQ with QJ and hit runner runner Jack to win. Slowed played Aces with two big raises in front of him and won that pot and he was up to about 40,000 in chips when we hit 27 players. The hand that was most impressive though, Jon called an all in with QJ clubs when the blinds were at 1600-800 for about 18,000 chips. The guy turned over QQ and the flop came 8c-9-c-10c a flopped straight FLUSH!!! Jon was now the massive chip leader with close to 80,000.

Now here comes my fall from grace. This young kid went all in when he was the small blind when there was about 13,000 in the pot, he roughly had 23,000 and I was at 29,000. I looked down at KK in the Big Blind and I just knew he didn't have AA. I was correct he turned over A-6 off after I thought for about a minute be fore calling and giving him the Phil Hilm Stare down.

The flop A-6-3 and I did not catch a King and was crippled to 6,000 in chips with the Blinds at 2000-1000 300 ante.

There were 21 players left and I didn't make the money. I pushed with A-9 and had 2 callers, AQ and 10-8 hearts. The 10 won and I was done for the evening AGAIN.

I win the hand and I have a great chance at winning this event. I had played so well and to have it snatched like this at the END as usual is why I am so frustrated.

Jon went on to chop with another player from France for about 7,000.00 after losing a pot that gave the Frenchman the chip lead.

It was a very well run Tournament by the director, a nice guy name Lloyd and the dealers also were enjoying themselves which speaks a lot due to all the hands they have dealt this year.

My wife had come down to witness my demise again and she knows I was very disappointed. The Main Event was over for the Evening and Jim came by to watch the Final few hands. He had a tough day and ended with around 54,000 in chips. He took us to the Rio bar where we had a few too many drinks and finally made it to bed about 5:30 am.

The girls were up at 9:30 and after a long shower we headed down to the Amazon Room to watch the live Broadcast of Poker Road. I have always talked about the twins to Joe and the guys however they had never met them. After the Show we went to the Rio buffet with Jim and Jon and as we said our goodbyes the girls begged me to take them to the Castle.."Excalibur" There second favorite place in Vegas next to the Rio.

We played a few games and were on the road home by 3:00pm.

So that is the Diamonds 2008 Family vacation. First time I have ever shared one with my five readers. Please leave me your thoughts of my three part story. Jim bet me I do not even have 5 readers!!

I am not disappointed in my play as a Poker Player..But as you know we need a certain amount of luck in these tournaments and I have NEVER been a lucky person other than the birth of my twins..So I bid you a farewell for awhile until the Bug hits me again.

Legends starts here in Los Angeles on July 30th and they are big buy in events. I may or may not try some satellites at the end of the month, but as I sit here and say goodbye to you, I doubt it.

Congratulations on your marriage Josh Nichols...and to you Jon for a great evening of Poker...Thanks...

Take Care...Be Safe...

It was a great vacation!! The money spent was worth every penny to see the smiles the Girls had each morning when they awoke. They were so excited to just Go ......

We arrived in Vegas at 5 minutes till noon and I drove straight to the Orleans Hotel and Casino for the first event of their Orleans Classic.

I made it upstairs to a ballroom they had setup for this series and registered along with 303 other players. I was in seat 7 and this maniac was in seat 5. I guess he thought he was playing a cash game because he was in every pot and by the first orbit was down to 250 chips. As my BB came back to me I look down at 99. Seat 5 won a few pots with all in bets and had his stack back up to 2000 chips. He raised 500 when the blinds were still only 25-50 and there was 175 chips in the pot. I thought for a minute and called the 500 and the others folded. Flop 9c-Jc-Kh. I bet 1500 chips because there were 2 clubs on the board and he folded. I folded AQ hearts two hands later when seat 5 went all in against a raiser who called with AKspades. Of course the flop came out all hearts and seat 5 showed 22 and doubled up.

I played tight and my position, I actually had some cards and was up to 7200 after starting with 4000. Seat 5 was on a rush and built his stack up to 8500 chips. As we were approaching level two I had Q-10 clubs in the SB and I called two limpers, seat 5 one of them. The flop came out 9-8-J rainbow I bet 125 and seat 5 raised to 400 and I called "All-IN" seat 5 folded K-10 face up and I know I over bet, but I wanted to take this pot down due to my past tournaments. I showed him my cards and the guy called me "A Lucky Bitch" I just looked at him and he immediately apologized and I just told him No Prob, I have been called worse.

I lost about 400 chips with AK on the button on a flop of 8-9-10 when another player put in 1500 chips after calling my raise.

Just before level 2 starts I am again the BB and have 88, one guy raises to 350 and seat 5 calls as I do. the flop is 6c-7c-8d and the initial raiser goes all in for about 2200 chips and seat 5 calls so I go all in incase he is on a flush draw for an additional 5000. Seat 5 calls and the first raiser has JJ and I have a set of eights and seat 5 has 5d-9h for a flopped straight. The river is no help and I am done just as level 2 starts. "Lucky Bitch" I should have said it as I walked out, but I do not want to be the amateur Phil Hellmuth.

So my wife and I get the girls from the playroom the Orleans has for kids and they charge $7.00 per Child. Pretty good deal in Vegas and they really enjoy the play room. It was only a cheap $28.00 and as I arrived to pick them up, Bianca says, "Daddy you broke playing Poker already" Yes Honey, I said. daddy is not a Lucky ..as my wife yelled, "Diamond" so I didn't finish my comment.

The movie theatre was right there so we paid 62.00 to go and see Hancock and I was very disappointed in it. The Hulk was much better!

So off to the Rio we go and we get our room and we head downstairs to the WSOP Convention after unpacking and having a talk with the girls about behaving. They are so excited we are at the Rio.

We watch Poker on ESPN all the time and they had begged me to stay here and I had to spoil them.They see the Rio on ESPN during the broadcasts and have seen it all lit up at night on previous trips, so the Rio it was this weekend.

As we get to the doors of the Convention Scotty Nguyen and Greg Raymer are there. Greg is signing autographs at a table and Scotty starts talking to the girls and sits on the floor with them a minute. he was really enjoying himself but to many people kept stopping so as he walked away signing autographs, he looked back and said goodbye to the girls.

The spectator crowd was huge in the Amazon Room so I did a quick walk through and said Hello to J.C. Tran and gave him one of the Charity Event shirts and also Jeff Madsen. I am fortunate to know them and these are the type of guys who are great for Poker.

I met up with the wife and kids and we started heading towards the Long walk back to the food court for some pizza. As we were walking Antonio Esfiandari who I know very well from the 2007 LAPC. we met there and he went on a ride along in Compton with a friend of mine because I was not patrolling at the time due to my Achilles tendon surgery. We have kept in touch and when he finally saw my girls he sat on the floor with them asked them for a hug and began to do magic tricks after peeling the girls off of him.

Antonio was so excited sitting there with the girls he ignored everyone who was trying to get an autograph. He pulled out a Poker Chip and began to do magic for the girls, the more excited they got, he got. He begged me to be able to babysit them one night and my wife and I agreed. Antonio's father was with him and he looked over at his Dad and said, "I have to get married"!

After Pizza we actually went up to the Room about 8:30 pm and I was probably asleep at 9:00, it had been a long week and we all needed a good night sleep. My good friends Jim Pittman and John Mcneely were coming into town and we were going to have breakfast with them. Jim is playing the Main Event at noon so I know he wanted a good breakfast and it takes my wife an hour or so just to get the girls a bath and dressed. With 7 of us taking showers we needed to be up by 9:30am at the latest.

Thursaday I will finish up the vacation and tell you about John and I running a table game and then entering the evening $340.00 NL tournament at the RIO..until then,,,Be safe...Take Care..

Well we just arrived home from our week long vacation and it was one to remember. We did so much I am going to have to tell you all about it in a series of blogs.

Last Monday evening we packed up and headed to Laughlin. We stayed in a Motel in Needles Monday night and early Tuesday we headed to Camp Moabi to launch the boat onto the Colorado River.

We stopped at The Topock marina and had breakfast which we do every year. It is a great place to eat any meal and the waitress who has been there for 19 years awaits are return every year.

After the usual great breakfast we headed down to Havasu lake where we parked in the channel and the girls played in the water for several hours. they collected rocks with different shapes to take to the Hotel later in the evening and paint. They enjoy doing this and it is something they do wherever we go.

As we left the trim on the boat would not go down and we slowly made our way towards Camp Moabi. We stopped a boat that tows broken down boats and he called a mechanic, Mike Diedrich who for a 125.00 fixed the problem in 45 minutes and we were back on our way to Laughlin. Mike saved us about $300.00 and is one hell of a guy.

We got into Laughlin about 6:00pm and bathed and I headed down to check out the Poker Room. I was told there was a Tournament getting ready to start over at the River palms casino so I headed over there to play. I had won one there last year and they usually get about 45-50 players. It is an $80.00 buy in with an extra $5.00 for 2000 more chips. There were almost 90 players which was a great turnout and I played my "A" game until we were down to 11 people. Only eight were going to get paid and first place was close to $1900.00.

I was second in chips and in the small blind with A-2 spades. Blinds were 1000-2000 and I had about 28,000 in chips.The chip leader limped in under the gun and I put in another 1000 chip to see the flop of A-A-2. I thought to myself ,COOOOOL...I bet out 4000 chips and the BB folded and the limper who was the chip leader went all in. Of course I called and I thought no way he had an Ace but when I called him he turned over A-8. He was shocked I had a full house and I was even more shocked he had an Ace. Of course the 8 came on the turn and I was on my way back to the Tropicana Poker Room to play the 2.00-6.00 Limit game there.

I had a good run making about $300.00 as I played until 5:00 am. We had to get up at 7:00 to go to the lake and the Boat had no problems and the Girls had a great day. I caught up on some sleep while at the lake and after eating a great Italian dinner at the Tropicana I again went to the Poker Room and played for about 4 hours making another 160.00 So far my winnings had paid for our gas on this trip. Between the Boat and my Expedition we used alot of gas.

Another deputy who I have known for years and is the Godfather to my Daughter Jasmine came out on Thursday and we headed to Cotton Wood Cove for the day. My girls saw there first catfish as we had a couple of fishing poles set up and I was going to cook it for dinner but my wife tossed it back in the Lake.(softy)

We set up some beer cans on the hill and had a dollar bet for every can we hit with the BB gun while sitting in the Boat. If you have ever been to the lake and know how the Boat rocks back and forth from the wakes,this was no easy task. Shawn finally gave up after I was to far ahead for him to catch up and I had him cook us all dinner and we called it even.

We went back to the Hotel and ate In an Out Burgers and I took the Girls to see WALLE. We went to bed early and instead of the lake on Friday, I took the girls to get their nails polished and do some shopping at Wal-Mart. This is what they wanted to do. It was 120 degrees in the shade and we were all a little tired from being in the Sun all week.

We then went and saw The Hulk and got ready to watch the AMAZING Firework Show..This show is the BEST. It is the main reason we go to Laughlin for the 4th every year and it would be worth just driving there to see it.

Tuesday I will tell you about heading to Vegas and Playing 2 Tournaments and networking for my Charity at the WSOP.. Till then...Be safe...Take Care..