Jameson Singer

Yes, I told you I'd go into detail of my worst experience during the WSOP and here it is. I actually wrote most of this while I was sitting around doing nothing during the early hours of the S.H.O.E. event because the hands are virtually meaningless.

Ah the S.H.O.E. event, I can't think of a better way to spend my Sunday. Not only are the first 4 hours more uneventful than watching a soccer match, but it's held in the tent at the Rio. If you've ever wondered what cookie dough feels like when it's placed into an oven set at 400 degrees, the poker tent is where you want to be.

I've seen field goals hook right because of the wind, baseball games get suspended because of rain, and even basketball games get postponed because of snow, but I've never seen the natural elements affect a poker game until now. Nevertheless, back to my nightmare covering the S.H.O.E. event.

As I look at the faces of the players in the event, I begin to wonder if they're more bored than I am. The first hour provides intense action as players bet $15 and then $30 and rake in stacks of $5 tournament chips.

Oh wow! Chip Jett is involved in an Omaha 8 or better hand. I'll have to continue this following the hand.

0:05 later...

Sorry about that. Chip Jett and an opponent were betting back and forth until finally Jett showed the nut-low while his opponent took the high. Chop it up, fellas. Several minutes of my life have been wasted as another observer of this event goes unsatisfied. Split pots are something that should be outlawed for the sheer fact that it goes against everything we've experienced in life. It's like watching a porno scene that ends after the fully clothed girl says, "Maybe you should punish me, officer".

1:30 later...

Well, it has been an hour and a half and I've yet to record a hand. I did, however, watch Daniel Negreanu get a massage. That was exciting. The tournament has now switched to it's fourth game of the evening, Stud Hi/Lo with a $5 ante, a $10 bring-in, and $30-$60 blinds. Sweet. Now that's something that will get your adrenaline pumping. Why do something like skydiving when I can watch a pot be split up between 3 people?

Now, I know what you avid poker fans are saying by this point. It's something along the lines of, "These are great games to play. Just because it's not your precious No-Limit Hold 'em doesn't mean it's not good". Let me just clarify now that I understand this. The thing that truly makes me want to stick my head into a microwave, however, is the low limits. $5 red chips are meant for the cash games, not for my tournament covering pleasure.

To further support this let me inform you that approximately 1:40 into this event they've just broke the first table. If you told me that was exciting I'm pretty positive I'd then be given the right to throw something at you...like a $5 tournament chip.

There it is. My adventures(or lack there of) while covering the S.H.O.E. event. For the record I did survive it to live another day.